User:Matt

I live in the state of South Dakota of the United States. It's next to Minnesota and south of North Dakota.

I came to Zelda Wiki.org in the middle of the month of April in 2008. I didn't edit much at first. I wasn't really sure how much of anything worked. But, thankfully, users like Adam and Ando were there to guide me. In a few week's time I rapidly became one of the most active members on Zelda Wiki.org.

Upon looking at Zeldapedia, I was not impressed. Sure some of the things that they were using over there were pretty cool, it really was inappropriate for an encyclopedia. It made the site seem more like a forum and a fan site, and not a professional work. Also I didn't like the idea of the fate of my wiki being at the mercy of the whim of a huge company that cared little for the content.

So I decided to stick here. I now consider the fate of Zelda Wiki.org intertwined with my own. If I see the Wiki going in a bad direction, then yes I will go into overdrive mode and try help to turn us back on to a clear course.

In the third week of November 2008, I was voted onto the site staff. I'm now a sysop here. I watch out for vandalism, even though it is rare here thanks to our awesome staff here and the great decisions that they made to protect this site. I'm always willing to help out newcomers to the site. We get a few of those each week.

• Many grammar fixes on many articles
• Merging of several articles
• Created most of the boss favorite userboxes
• Created the Fierce Deity fan userbox
• Adding sheet music for many songs
• Adding copyright templates to many pictures
• Corrected many inaccuracies
• Added additional information to several articles
• Suggested the featured content nomination template
• Created the article and picture reminder templates
• Created the Featured Templates category
• Created the User Talk Archive template
• Created the Ex-Featured Content category
• Added a table of items that the Curiosity Shop will buy
• Put the user edit table in template form
• Made a few cool tables
• Created the Fan Theory template, at the request of Axiomist
• Took part in The Midna Art Debate
• Sorted contents of many template categories
• Created the ZeldaWiki member userbox
• I typically play the role of babysitter on this site. Actually, this happens a lot!
• Created the Challenges page.
• Explained what rent-a-moding is
• Created, well it was a redirect, the Silver Membership article
• Expanded the Gold Membership article to include information on Phantom Hourglass
• Created the Platinum Membership and the VIP Membership articles
• Made an optional field for the PH userbox
• Added the optional field to a few other userboxes
• Rewrote the article Curiosity Shop Guy
• Put together a great list of Firefox Hints
• Made a new field on the archive template
• Made all fields optional on the archive template
• Changed the cite template so that it can be used for non-character quotes without linking. Also changed so that it didn't try to link to the article that it is in.
• Added much needed references to the Link article
• Created the Quote of the Day userbox
• Created the Day template
• Created the Archiving help page
• Created the References template
• Started the Linking Secrets page
• Helped improve the quality of our Quality Standards
• Eliminated the need for the noclog template
• Created the split template
• Created a detailed weapon comparison on Swords of Majora's Mask
• Created the content of the Help:Image Sourcing‎ page
• Created the Zelda Wii page
• Created the Featured Content Templates FP and FA
• Created the page Enemy Analysis in Twilight Princess‎
• Created the category Articles Containing Theories
• Figured out a way to get signatures again
• Created the User Signatures category
• Created the Unsign template
• Created the Archives Template
• Seriously improved the Cite Template
• Allowed the template Main to have custom links
• Created the template RTOC
• Aligned everything in the Dungeon Item List‎
• Solved the issue of using User Signatures in the nickname box
• Created the Space tempate
• Created the Refbar template
• Created the NoWikiTemp template
• Created the Plainlink] template
• Properly categorized 54 pages to the Places in The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time category that were previously in a similar, but incorrectly named category.
• Created the BossNav template
• Fixed the problems with the User Edits userbox
• Uploaded the image Great Fairy.png
• Created the Vandalism Userbox
• Created the Move template
• Created the Articles to be moved category
• Expanded the User activeness template‎

Kotake: [with halos over their heads] Hey, Koume, what is that above your head?

Koume: I don't know, but you have one over your head too, Kotake! But I'm only 400 years old!

Kotake: And I'm just 380 years old!

Koume: We're twins! Don't try to lie about your age!

Kotake: You must have gone senile!

Koume: Who are you calling senile? Is that how you treat your older sister?

Kotake: We are twins! How can you be older?

Koume: Keeeyaaah! How heartless you are!

Kotake: How can you be so ungrateful?

Koume: You're heartless!

Kotake: You ungrateful... (they both fly up to beyond)

Oh my god! Why am I so stupid? I wanna be smart!

— Girl A

Wednesday is the best day of the day!

— Girl B

How many hours are there between noon and six-o-clock? Don't you have to add a twelve or something?

— Girl C

I hate trying to think!

— Girl D

Everyone who isn't here raise your hand.

— Boy A

Nope! We're all here! Let's go!

— Boy B

If I don't pass this test, I am seriously fu***d! [turns around to find the teacher standing right behind him] Oh... um... I didn't know you were here!

— Boy B (I've never seen a face so red before.
The teacher just smiled and shook his head.)

[runs into the door] Ow... My boob!

— Girl C, again. she forgot to turn the handle

Here's a rather funny incident. This is probably the cleverest trick I have ever seen someone pull off.

I'm going to put this tape over the camera. No one say anything!

— Boy B

The teacher and the rest of the class walk in. It takes a few minutes for anyone to notice anything.

Hey. What's wrong with the screen? There's a blurry spot.

— Boy C

What?

— The Teacher

He goes up to the camera. He discovers the tape.

There's tape here! Who put this on here? [Boy A's name] ! It was you wasn't it?

— The Teacher

No! It wasn't!

— Boy A

Yes it was. Just for that, you've got to turn in the assignment tomorrow. Everyone else turns it in at the regular time. Now come here and peel off this tape!

— The Teacher

What the hell!

— Boy A

[quietly] Heh, heh, heh, heehh!

— Boy B

Calculus class. Mega-sized assignments. There were three more work days left. Took him ten minutes to get the tape off. And Boy A never found out that the tape was placed there by Boy B. The rest us had no reason to inform either the teacher or Boy A of the details. We still are not sure if Boy B planned the whole thing or was just lucky. But it is likely that he did in fact plan it since it's usually Boy A doing all the stupid things. (Yes the test Boy B mentioned above was a calc test.)

Murchadah and AuronKaizer said these.

(Deleted Subpage) Author request: Yep! Deletin' my own page. Why? Ask the Puppetman in my head.

— Murchadah

Eight suggestions per week, you no good pile of dead weasel babies.

— Murchadah

Yes, boys and girls, cats are in fact part of a well balanced diet.

— Murchadah

Did what I could. Apparently, someone thought Talon was a female.....

— Murchadah

Last time I voted "yes" for something like this, Bush became president.

— Murchadah

Muhahaha! I say we torch 'em all and that'll be the end of that! KEEHEEEHEEHEHEEHEEE!!!!!!!!! ...I forgot my meds.

— AuronKaizer

Whew, that's the last of it. Time to celebrate with beer.

— AuronKaizer

Rewrite. I need some sleep, cheerio peeps.

— AuronKaizer

Always make sure something is completely useless (like Jimmy Kimmel) before you delete something.

— AuronKaizer

My brain is shot...time to call it night night...in just a minute.

— AuronKaizer

Pimped out arrow? What the hell?

— AuronKaizer

I'm legally changing my name to I. M. Pro

— AuronKaizer

I must have brained my damage.

— AuronKaizer

Heh, glad nobody's here to see me screw up!

— AuronKaizer

Things said by me.

I'm not as think am you tired I as!

— Matt

Dumb ass birds. No sleep for me. I'll live.

— Matt

Crapity, crap, crap!

— Matt

Ahhh, crappy crap!

— Matt

Where's my brain today. Forgot to preview.

— Matt

More colors! Mwaa hahaha!

— Matt

Beef, it's what's for the dash!

— Matt

My brain hurt my sleep.

— Matt

Save, see, nooooooo!!

— Matt

If I didn't have clue what that word was, then very few others would. Changed.

— Matt

I had to change this. I know that it was a correct term. But "loves his chicks" sounds like the word is being used to refer to a "certain kind of female". It just was wrong in the wrong way.

— Matt

I think that using material from talented artists is preferable to just sitting on our butts and leaving crap...

— Matt

Dang it. I've got to slow down we I type.

— Matt

Attention: I have lost my brain!

— Matt

[After four or five edit conflicts] Can I respond at all here?

— Matt

I hate music notes and I knew that.

— Matt

Well I feel dumb.

— Matt

Ohhh ,balls. That was dumb of me.

— Matt

Sorry but I despise the word "albeit". Seems lazy to me.

— Matt

The word "albeit" means "although it be". Sounds pretty dumb anywhere.

— Matt

Ow,. Side. Pain. Ouch.. Ahh. My skull muscles! Please end the laughter!. The pain of the funny is too much!

— Matt

[Finds the words: "every single gay I own"] Whooa? How did that word show up? I must be tired. [Changed to : "every single game I own"]

— Matt

Du, du, duuu, dumb!

— Matt

The troll just complained about this. So I clarified.

— Matt

No, no, no. I wanted it to be hard to notice! This is good. heheheheheheeeeee!!!

— Matt

What does an undead skeleton do with money?

— Matt

Preview, Matt, you must preview.

— Matt

I'm fairly certain that the "of"'s need not be capitalized.

— Matt

Missing brain, please return if found.

— Matt

Fixed grammar, this entire article was one sentence!

— Matt

Me thinking thingy go bye. Me miss it.

— Matt

Brain, brain went away. I hope it comes back another day.

— Matt

Come back brain. I miss you.

— Matt

Nope. My brain is still missing. A reward is being offered for its return.

— Matt

Removed bad theory. Using this logic, Ganondorf must have regular sessions at tanning salons since his skin is so dark

— Matt

Removed bad theory. With this logic, the moon must be made of cheese since they both can look the same.

— Matt

?? How did you get here so fast. Do you have a homing beacon on your name or something?

— Matt

Stalboars? What the hell? People are dumb.

— Matt

It was supposed to be Stalhounds.

What the hell?! I never clicked save on this! How the hell did this show up!?

— Matt

I like my brain when it does all the work for me!

— Matt

You silly brits and your silly spellings.

— Ando

Just remember where your degenerated language came from in the first place ;)

— Adam

Yeah, Anglo-Frisian dialects of Germanic settlers and Roman auxiliary troops from parts of what is today Germany :P :P :P

— Matt

I know that the human being and the fish can coexist peacefully.

— President George W. Bush

One of our goals is to setup democracies in foreign countries such as Germany.

— President George W. Bush

The vast majority of our imports come from outside the country.

— President George W. Bush

One word sums up probably the responsibility of any Governor, and that one word is ‘to be prepared’.

— President George W. Bush

It isn’t pollution that’s harming the environment. It’s the impurities in our air and water that are doing it.

— President George W. Bush

It is official. Our President is an idiot.

We have a firm commitment to NATO, we are a part of NATO. We have a firm commitment to Europe. We are a part of Europe.

— President George W. Bush

Throughout our history, the words of the Declaration have inspired immigrants from around the world to set sail to our shores. These immigrants have helped transform 13 small colonies into a great and growing nation of more than 300 people.

— President George W. Bush

I don't know where bin Laden is. I have no idea and really don't care. It's not that important. It's not our priority.

— President George W. Bush

If this were a dictatorship, it'd be a heck of a lot easier, just so long as I'm the dictator!

— President George W. Bush
It's true! See I'm the dictator!

Our enemies are innovative and resourceful, and so are we. They never stop thinking about new ways to harm our country and our people, and neither do we.

— President George W. Bush

Oh! That explains why the country is going to hell!

Various Star Wars Quotes

The ability to speak does not make you intelligent.

— Qui-Gon Jinn

Mine! Or I will help you not!

— Yoda

This is funny.

I've been had. General, I request permission to jump from an upper-story balcony, to ease my shame.

— Wes Jason

And the response is:

Granted

— Wedge Antillies

Keep out of children.

— kitchen knife warning label

Entrance only. Do not enter.

— Sign on a door

Warning: Do not attempt to swallow

— Mattress

Do not attempt to stick head inside deck, which may result in injury.

— Japanese GameCube Instruction Manual

Be kind - rewind.

— Blockbuster Rental DVD

Keyboard not detected. Press any key to continue.

— My old computer said this once.

Do not turn upside down

— Warning on the underside of a TV dinner tray.

This product has not been tested on animals.

— Can of insect repellent

Caution: Never aim spray at your own eyes.

— Pepper Spray

Warning: May contain traces of nuts

— Hershey's Almond Bar

Road wet when raining

— Sign on a highway

Caution: Non-Flammable

— Fire Extinguisher

Suitable for outdoor use.

— Rain Gauge

Do not attempt to stop chain with hands.

— Chainsaw

Warning: Do not attempt to remove blade while lawnmower is running

— Lawnmower

[ Link enters room to find Tetra as a statue.]

Ciela:

"Is that... Tetra? What are we going to do? She's... a statue!"

[Enter Linebeck]

Linebeck:

"Oh. Hey. Sorry I'm late, kid! That fog just disappeared, so I charged in to find you. So... about that treasure! You got piles of it, right?"

Ciela:

"How... how can you even say that?! Link's friend is in trouble! And all you can think about is treasure?!"

[Linebeck steps closer and looks a Tetra]

Linebeck:

"Oh, so this is your friend? She's looking a bit pale."

[Linebeck begins pounding on Tetra's head and examines her face.]

Linebeck:

"Ooh, something isn't right with this girl! Her... soul didn't get sucked away, did it?!"

Unkown Person:

"This evil ship drained away her life force."

[All able turn to see who has come.]

Ciela:

"Grandpa! What are you doing here?!"

[Oshus walks up to Link.]

Oshus:

"If you have come this far, Link... The power of the hero is with you. Now is the time for me to tell the rest of the story. You're a clever boy. You may already know this... You see, these seas are my domain. I am not Oshus... I am the Ocean King. I was savagely attacked by an unfathomable evil. His name... is Bellum."

[Oshus begins to hold up various images as he continues his story.]

Oshus:

"His evil ran so deep that it leeched the very life force from me. As you know, every creature in this world possesses a sacred power. This power is called life force. The Sand of Hours is a physical manifestation of that power. And that is what brought them here. I struggled against my attacker in a great clash. But his evil was so dark that it slowly drained away my own life force. He was always a step ahead of my attacks, and I was eventually overcome. I was dragged to the sunless depths of the temple..."
"Sealed up, my life force continues to drain away. Using the life force he leeched from me... His evil spread, and bred more and more foul monsters. The spirits of Power and Wisdom were also imprisoned. But Ciela managed to split her soul and escape. That split was why so much of her memory was lost."
"Even among the monsters born of the Sand of Hours, some are especially evil. The Phantoms who roam my temple take after the evil of their master. Supernatural strength, wrapped in plate armor... virtually invincible. They prowl the temple, searching for victims. No one can harm them. Of course, they were created to be untouchable."
"I had only one option. My ocean of strength had drained to just a puddle. Using my last ounce of strength, I cloned myself, just as Ciela did. Then I made a humble home on Mercay Island. I used the Sand of Hours to make the hourglass and enter the temple. I studied my foe, searching for ways to defeat Bellum, and waited for my chance."

"Ciela, I'm sorry I could not tell you sooner. I worried about the spirits of Power and Wisdom. I never expected to find you on the beach. You'd lost your memory, and monsters were nearby. I thought it best to keep quiet until the time came."

[Link stands up. Linebeck begins to lean on Tetra, who begins to rock back and forth.]

Oshus:

"The sea's islands are rich with life force. The evil things appeared to devour that."

[Tetra falls over. Linebeck falls into utter panic.]

Oshus:

"They just want to fill their empty bellies."

[Linebeck reaches down to pick up Tetra.]

Oshus:

"They hunger for life force!"

[Linebeck picks up Tetra and examines her for damage.]

Oshus:

"The Ghost Ship was made to drain that life force. They used a story of treasure to lure people in. It wasn't enough for Bellum to steal MY life force. He had to take what little he could from the people."

[As everyone begins to turn around, Linebeck quickly straightens out Tetra and assumes a serious, I-don't-care kind of pose.]

Oshus:

"Tetra must have had a bold, vibrant soul. The Ghost Ship was drawn to that power. She didn't find it... It found her."

[A peaceful tone of Zelda's Theme plays and Link brings his hand to Tetra's. Linebeck watchs at first, but realization dawns upon him.]

Linebeck:

"Wait... so you're saying there's NO TREASURE?!"

Oshus:

"Yes, that's what I'm saying."

[Linebeck sways and then faints. Oshus turns around to talk to Link. Linebeck begins to crawl, unseen, to the other side of the room.]

Oshus:

"From what I can sense, Tetra is still alive. There is an island north of the Isle of Gust. Go there and find Zauz. He is a blacksmith. He will tell you more about the great evil. He knows how to slay Bellum."

[On the other side of the room, Linebeck calls out. Link's eyes go wide.]

Linebeck:

"This is some kind of sick joke, old man! The treasure! What about all the TREASURE! That was the only reason I put my life on the line! And now there's no treasure? Well, I... QUIT!"

[Link's eyes are still very wide. Ciela rushes up to Linebeck.]

Ciela:

"You quit? Didn't you even listen to his story? You're a man of the sea... Don't you want to help the Ocean King?!"

[Linebeck turns his back to Ciela. Link is still wide-eyed.]

Linebeck:

"NO! And you can't use my ship anymore!"

Oshus:

"Heh... heh... No, no. I would never ask you to do this for free. If you help us defeat Bellum... I will grant you one wish. What do you say to that?"

[Dramatic music plays. Linebeck strikes several triumphant poses.]

Linebeck:

"HEY! Quit standing around, kid! The Ocean King is in trouble! Ship out, kid! Anchors aweigh! I said, MOVE IT!"

[Everyone else stares at him for a very long moment.]

Oshus:

"Hmmph. One word about a wish, and he leaped to action! I'm so sorry... I shouldn't have involved you and Tetra in all this."

Linebeck:

"What are you doing Link? Grab that Tetra of yours and get back to my ship!"